our way

I was looking through old pictures and came across this collage that I just love. It sums up our summer spent at MN lakes (appropriately), it shows my kids playing together but most of all it shows us doing it on our own and having a blast.


I remember being so nervous about having two kids close together and the responsibility it brings. Would I ever have time for myself? How could I even stay on top of things? Maybe a once a week shower was okay? The mind plays terrible tricks on you. My fears were washed away and founded all at the same time once Henry came.

Let's see, do I have time for myself? Sure. Before 6:30am and after 7:30pm and occaisionally during our ever-diminishing nap time. Doesn't mean I can necessarily leave the house, but it's me time. I'll take it.

Am I on top of things? No and never will be. That being said, I've navigated responsibilities and have grown in confidence to cook healthy meals on a regular basis, find a system to do 4 loads of weekly laundry at the shared Harvard laundry facilities, manage our food and clothing supplies (hard for hungry and growing kids), discover that simplicity helps keep a clean home, set aside time for family home evening/church attendance/gospel discussions/prayer and scripture study and realized ultimately the rest will either fall into place or simply not make the list of things to do. How's that for a long sentence? A long sentence for a long and continuing journey.

And yes, I shower more than once a week but it takes flexibility and juggling to fit things in for myself, including shower as rudamentary as that sounds.

We move to Boston, are surrounded by single students who are all fabulous people in their own way, but manage to live a life more similar to a senior in high school than to me. So many times I feel like I'm living in a polarized world, and I am.

One of the biggest lessons I've learned during my time here is to do things our own way. While there are masses of people living an opposite life, there are also a handful of people here who live similarly. On one had polarized, on the other homogeneous. Homogenous for one reason or another brings out insecurities, doubt, competition, scruitny, and worst of all compromises. It also brings about so many close friendships - that's another post.

Back to Henry. In the midst of all my worries, I never could have seen one of the greatest blessings that would come about more than a year after he was born. Madeleine and Henry have each other. Entertainment doesn't have to come from other people, children or friends. It can come from each other. Boston has taught us to not only have our own system for laundry, grocery shopping, and cleaning, but also a system for our family. While it's great that we have so many close friends nearby, and can't get enough of the activities and events here - those are all a bonus. I've found it more rewarding and fulfilling to have my home and family in order first...then the friends will fall into place in the appropriate way.

We are socially self-reliant. It's an amazing and liberating realization that has given me confidence in going forward and preparing for #3. We're not anti-social, that's essentially impossible here. But we have the ability to have our morning filled by simply taking the wagon outside and playing together. We can play together as a family and I hope that never changes. Two kids close together in an incredibly intense social environment has taught me the efforts to create a family culture, as taught by Elder Perry here are undoubtedly worthwhile.

"You will come to know that what appears today to be a sacrifice will prove instead to be the greatest investment that you will ever make." ~Gordon B. Hinckley

Friends are important, family is essential and every sacrifice to keep it that way is worth it.